Better Alternatives to Seeing the Sex and the City Movie

Posted on May 18, 2008 by thericker

  • Weld a baking pan to my face, then make some fucking brownies on my fucking face
  • Get a Carbon Emissions Test (while reading excerpts from the script for SEX & THE CITY with your super cute, but unavailable mechanic)
  • Drink pee – mine or yours, either option is better than the movie
  • Hang out with Matthew Broderick 23 years ago and warn him it wouldn’t always be this good
  • Listen to a goth girl talk about her feelings
  • Die of dysentery
  • Get a root canal on my eye
  • Genetically alter your DNA to ensure that Rip Torn is your dad
  • Buy a Terabyte drive and back up my HD
  • Go to a Raffi concert
  • Eat shit. Literally.
  • Find “the one” and just never let go!
  • Read reviews of the Sex & The City movie
  • Suck on a tailpipe
  • Actually HAVE the baby!
  • Mind your P’s & Q’s
  • Insert a glass rod in my dick hole and break it off
  • Read reviews of the Sex & The City movie

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Filed under: Adam, Jim, Rick | Tagged: , , , ,

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5 Responses

  1. von schneider, on June 1st, 2008 at 9:09 pm Said:

    the spider is hilarious.

    Reply
  2. realbadbrotha, on June 12th, 2008 at 5:43 pm Said:

    buy a terabyte of soft core porn, so you can watch real sex. although its probably in the suburbs

    Reply
  3. realbadfriend, on June 13th, 2008 at 8:48 am Said:

    Haha – that’s fucking hilarious. Softcore!

    Reply
  5. ian, on November 4th, 2008 at 9:33 am Said:

    i am a personal friend of rip torns granddaughter. seriously. booya your blog is funny

    Reply

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